There Is Great. And There Is Greatness…

I love the interwebs! This may just be the best 2 minutes 15 seconds of your life!

You go Italian guy with Diet Coke, Mentos, a condom & Nutella! FORZA ITALIA!

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It blowed up! It blowed up real good!

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Shenanigans!

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Put Some Shoes On!

Milano Cafe in Los Angeles. A favorite of the ragged masses for over a century now!

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Milano Cafe! Send us your tired, your poor, Your huddled masses yearning to breathe free, The wretched refuse of your teeming shore…
and we’ll give ‘em a big ole plate of pasta that the savages can eat in the street!

And this helps promote your restaurant how?

milano

And put some shoes on ya filthy animal!

Hey. If it works it works. Time for pasta!

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Baked Eggs With Cheese

“Share The Meat” recipes. Baked eggs with cheese photographed by Ann Rosener – United States Office of War Information.

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Rich in iron and vitamin B, eggs can be cooked a hundred delicious ways. Baked eggs with cheese is a particularly good egg dish, simple and quick to prepare. Ingredients, in addition to eggs, are grated cheese, bread crumbs, milk, butter, salt and pepper.

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Break the desired number of eggs into a hot, well-greased shallow baking dish. Dot with butter or other fat, sprinkle with salt and pepper. Pour just enough milk over eggs to cover them. Sprinkle with a mixture of grated cheese and dry bread crumbs. Bake in a very moderate oven until the eggs are set and the crumbs are brown.

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Eggs with cheese may be served in the same dish in which they have been baked. A wonderful, vitamin-rich substitute, this dish is an all-American favorite for luncheon or supper.

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Captain Kirk Eating An Apple

The title says it all. But Kirk is eating that apple with such, such passion!

Applllllllllllle!

The title says it all, but Kirk being Kirk, he is eating that apple with such, such…passion!

 

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Count Chocula

Count Chocula plush for just a bone-fifty. Kneel before Zod Count Chocula!

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Boo Berry? Franken Berry? Losers!

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What Did Paat Buy Today? #23

Oh, hot damn! Just Robert McKay’s 1971 classic novel The Troublemaker that’s what! And for just 50 cents!

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Damn rock-n-rolling rebel! Quit fighting against the “Man”
and get into line with the rest of us! Oh you troublemaker!

From the Google synopsys, “To some, Jesse is a born troublemaker but to many others he is a high school senior asking to be treated as a citizen with feelings and rights.” Fight on Jesse! And button your shirt while you’re at it hippie!

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Save the Meat – Braised Stuffed Heart

Braised stuffed heart! Next in our series of “Save the Meat” recipes photographed in October of 1942 by Ann Rosener for the Office of War Information.

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To supplement the voluntary weekly meat allotment of two and a half pounds per person, housewives are turning to the unlimited supply of “variety” meats on the market. Beef or calf hearts are among these meats which are rich in iron and vitamin B. To prepare braised stuffed heart select one beef heart, or two or three calf hearts. A simple stuffing of onion, celery, herbs, and bread crumbs gives distinction to the dish.

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Wash and slit the hearts, remove gristle and blood vessels.

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For the stuffing, chop an onion and a stalk of celery into two tablespoons of fat and cook for a few minutes. Add two to three cups of soft bread crumbs and season to taste with salt and pepper. Thyme goes well with heart–add a pinch to the stuffing.

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Fill hearts with stuffing and sew up the slit with coarse thread.

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Brown the hearts on all sides in fat, then place in a covered baking dish or casserole. Add a half of cup of water, cover closely and cook until tender in a very moderate oven (about 300 degrees Fahrenheit). Calf hearts require about one and a half hours, beef hearts will require much longer–four to five hours to cook till tender.

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Make gravy of the pan drippings and serve the hearts piping hot, garnished with crisp greens.

Mmmmm! That’s some good heart! Bon appetit!

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You Wish You Were This Cool

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Very few would even try this look.
Beer Dude owns this look.

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El Hombre Nuclear

Attention! Attention! From this moment forward I will only answer to my new title of:

    Que es mas macho?     El Hombre Nuclear es mas macho!     Si!

Que es mas macho?
El Hombre Nuclear es mas macho!
Si!

Thank you in advance for your cooperation.

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Kung Fu Grip!

joe_head

Joe: Stacy, please, I must have you back.
Just come for a ride with me in my Mobile Command Unit.
Stacy: Joe, I told you, it’s over. Release me from your Kung-Fu Grip.
Joe: Fine. I’ll bomb your house into the ground, missy.
Lisa vs Malibu Stacy – The Simpson S5 E14

Damn! Joe was one creepy dude.

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SANDWICH!

Someone’s got it all going on. And that someone’s got a sandwich.

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Yeah. I’m a sandwich kind of guy.
Want to make something of it?

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El Borracho

El Borracho. Must mean bottle dancer or something.

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I am El Borracho!
And I fart bacon!

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Son of Lassie

Random synopsis from the 1945 classic Son of Lassie! Dog make way from the UK to Norway to save master. Dog barks at Nazis! Nazis lose!

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Just growls at Nazis? To hell with you Lassie!
It’s was killed or be killed with them boys!
This is why the war went on for so long. Stupid dog.

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Happy 4th of July

She has been shopping and bought a flag for the Fourth of July. Caldwell, Idaho. Russell Lee - July 4, 1941

She has been shopping and bought a flag for the Fourth of July. Caldwell, Idaho. Photo by Russell Lee – July 4, 1941

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Naked T-Bird! Naked T-Bird!

Wasson High School had a “we’re closing, goodbye” shindig today. We, Damon, Dave, Kevin, Todd (Boog) and I, went, saw some old friends, wandered around the school a bit, got yelled at for wandering around the school and saw a naked mascot and a bunch of clocks all set the the same time. It was a pretty good day. A pretty good day indeed.

Goodbye Wasson

Fat guy Boog, Kevin, random fat guy and non-random fat guy Dave in the courtyard.

Goodbye Wasson

Naked mascot! Dammit! NAKED MASCOT!

Goodbye Wasson

Don’t know why the naked mascot bothered me so, but it did.
I hate naked mascots. I hate them so.

Goodbye Wasson

Damon wearing a Kachina mask.
Guess this had something to do with T-Birds, oh, and Damon.

Goodbye Wasson

Peered through into the school and saw this mystery clock mechanical room. Who needs 7 clocks? 7 clocks set to the same time? Who?!

Goodbye Wasson

So we wandered in, sans Dave, through an open door
and saw the mystery clock room up close.
No answers, just a better photo.

Goodbye Wasson

Here’s Boog just before a gnome yelled at us and we had to flee.
BOOG!

That’s was our day at Wasson. We also ate some Yakitori, had a beer and watched Dave get buggered by a ghost in some Mario game. So there.

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Foosball Table Stolen

I do hear that foosball is the devil.

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Gazette – May 14, 1974.
Dudes needed to get out more.

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El Juego de los Milagros, Federico Arnaud, “Mundos de la Pelota”

Damn! I really want that game. It looks awesome! Blasphemous, but still awesome.

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Moonfleet

Today's Random Synopsis is from the 1955 picture Moonfleet. Just the story of a lad and a dandy, who's a smuggler! seeking a long-lost gem! I got confused with the whole lad/dandy dynamic and lost track of the plot. Just a star and a half from Paat.

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One of these above guys is the lad and one is the dandy.
I’m thinking the lad is the dude without a wig, he looks lad-ish,
while the dude in the wig is the dandy, because that is a dandy wig.

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Meatland’s City Of Meats

Places Paat has been – August 31, 2003. Meatland’s City Of Meats in North Tampa, Florida. It was closed. Hell, it looked shut for good. How could a national treasure like Meatland’s City Of Meats go out of business?

meatland_2003

City of Light? City of Angels? Psssh! Behold! The City Of Meats!

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Satan On The Toilet

“Earlier on this broadcast, I said a word so vile that it should only be uttered by Satan himself while sitting on the toilet. I apologize and will make a large donation to charities that fight teen cursing. Good night.”  Kent Brockman (The Simpsons, “You Kent Always Say What You Want” S18E22)

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“I, for one, welcome our new insect overlords”

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Random Synopsis of the Day

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I am sad I didn’t get to watch this. Sounds awesome!

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Sweet Jiminy! This thing brings some fear don’t it?

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You Will Now Know Fear

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KILL IT! KILL IT WITH FIRE!

Thought you’d might not want to sleep tonight, or ever again.

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Stereos And Such

From the classic 1977 National Lampoon album,That’s Not Funny, That’s Sick!” with Bill Murray, Brian Doyle-Murray and Christopher Guest.

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What a deal. For only $999.

Bill Murray – ‘Hey asswipe. Where’d you get that Sansuchi amplifier?

Brian Doyle-Murray – ‘I got it at Stereos and Stuff jagoff and it only cost me $999!

Bill Murray – ‘$999! What a deal! For the ampliflier and the tuner?

Brian Doyle-Murray - ‘Yeah. That’s not all shitface. I also got an anti-static record cloth and two HLH Crowd-Quadio Cuatro Quirk 3000 speakers you’re drooling all over, scumbag.

Bill Murray – ‘Only $999. I must be some sort of Neanderfuck for not having gone down to Stereos and Stuff and gotten one already. I gotta fire up some money. God I got my head up my ass sometimes.

Christopher Guest – ‘IF YOU’VE GOT YOUR HEAD UP YOUR ASS ABOUT STEREOS COME TO STEREOS AND SUCH LOCATED IN THE BERGEN SHOPPING MALL.’

Give it a listen:

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Just A Freaky Head

Saw this gem at the upscale junk store and I so wanted to buy it. But, alas, it was not for sale. Bastards.

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Dude. Dude. You really need an eyebrow trim.

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Hey! Are you Hugo’s dad?

Heads of Paat Island

Hello Mr. Mustache Head. Are you my father?

hugo_ad

Hugo was awesome! AWESOME!
click to embiggen

I may not have bought the mustache-head, but I still have my Hugo-head. Life is good.

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Random Synopsis of the Day

“Man fleeing a murder scene is unaware a pretty runaway is hiding in his backseat. When they arrive at 77 Sunset Strip, Kookie avidly takes in the teenager to protect her from the killers. But the ginchy Carrie doesn’t want to hide, she’s come to Hollywood to crash the movies and meet Sugarfoot. Bailey & Spencer’s sleazy rival, Shamus Legs Carson weasels in on the case when he hears there’s a big reward for finding the starstruck teen.” 77 Sunset Strip: Season 2, Episode 2, The Kookie Caper (October 9, 1959).

Hey Beaver Cleaver's Teacher! Get away from that young hoodlum! He's nothing but trouble!

Hey Beaver Cleaver’s Teacher!
Get away from that young hoodlum!
He’s nothing but trouble!

These kids and their damn slang.

These kids and their damn slang.
Click to embiggen

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What Did Paat Buy Today? #22

Just The Green Eagle Score by Richard Stark for a quarter!

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Just look at him! Look at Parker!
(At least I think the dude with the gun and the smoke, and the half-naked chick, is Parker.)
Still! Look at him!

Can’t wait to read this beaut! Betcha Parker’s going to do some thievin’! And some lovin’! And more thievin’!

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Random Synopsis of the Day

“Despite being undercover dressed as Santa Claus, Hooker is finding it hard to get into the Yuletide cheer faced with his first Christmas away from Fran and the children, while Stacy, too, is low on Christmas spirit after splitting up with her boyfriend. The Christmas blues set in even deeper when a drug stakeout doesn’t go to plan, allowing the main target to get away.”  TJ Hooker: Season 3, Episode 12, Slay Ride (17 Dec. 1983)

Hey! It’s Captain Kirk!

Merry Christmas punk!

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King Vitaman! – UPDATED!!

Look what I found at the used food store today! I wish the box art was intact. I bet it was awesome!

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Hey! Just a buck forty nine! Still didn’t buy it.
Screw you King Vitamin! Screw! You!

UPDATE! Now with is cool creepy King Vitamin commercial from 1972!

I did buy some ancient chocolate Pop Rocks for Annelise. Just a dime a pack! I splurged and bought 5!

poprocks

Damn! I’m a great dad!
No expired food is too good for my little girl!

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The Devil’s Place Setting

It’s good to see that Satan has found a hobby making these novelty plates in his workshop in Hell:

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I was too creeped out to see if they were $65.00 $45.00 each, or $65.00 $45.00 for all three.

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LOOK INTO MY EYES!

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I SAID LOOK INTO MY EYES!

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YOUR SOUL IS MINE NOW!

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MINE! MINE!! HA! HA HA!! HA HA HA!!!

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REMEMBER, I’LL BE WATCHING YOU!
WATCHING YOU!
WATCHING YOU!

 

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Random Synopsis of the Day

“Two geologist friends of Steve Austin disappear in Californa while placing earthquake sensors in the woods. A giant footprint is found nearby, leading to speculation of the involvement of a Sasquatch.” The Six Million Dollar Man: Season 3, Episode 17, The Secret of Bigfoot (1 Feb. 1976)

Bigfoot in the Woods. By JNL

Bigfoot in the Woods. By JNL

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What Did Paat Buy Today? #21

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This is a store I really, really want to find.

Independent Records had a 10 CDs for a buck sale on Monday. I walked out with 47 CDs, 1 Shaft VHS tape, the 2001 book and an empty jewel case, empty because I was too tired to look (or care) any more. Scored the lot for just $5.37!

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That Shaft is a bad mother…shut your mouth…I’m taking about that bargain hunter Shaft.

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Yo! Quiero Cabin Boy!

There’s a new Taco Bell commercial kicking around with some fancy chef going all Gordon Ramsey on her underlings trying to get the burrito recipe right. First, it’s frickin’ Taco Bell! Yeah, they have a chef. A Chef that thinks up recipes to make drunks and stoners happy when they inhale food at 1:00 am. That’s why they have so many Doritos based recipes. Second, Chris Elliott, the Chris Elliott from Cabin Boy, David Letterman, Something About Mary and Get a Life, is in it. Really!

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Here’s the fancy burrito they’re pushing.
What are the chances you’re going to get one that looks
anything like this from you local Taco Bell?

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Here is Chris Elliott.

Here's the chef with Chris tagging along as he gets ragged on for not making a burrito correctly.

Here’s the chef with Chris tagging along as he gets ragged on for not making a burrito correctly.

And here is Mr. Elliott at the moment when he finally gets it!

And here is Mr. Elliott at the moment when he finally gets it!

Here’s the full commercial. Chris Elliott must really be hard up for cash working at Taco Bell and all after being Mr. Hollywood and everything.

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Valentine’s Day!

Happy Valentine’s Day to Mrs. PaatK.com! Hope you enjoy these sweet old-fashiony cards!

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Nothing says love like a fish hugging an onion.

girl-in-fridge-valentines-card

Yeah. Kids and refrigerators. That’ll end well.

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Psycho Clown
Qu’est Que C’est
Fa fa fa fa fa fa fa fa fa far better
Run run run run run run run away

val38_cat

I love you! Now here’s a crazy cat!

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What Did Paat Buy Today? #20

Indiana Paat: There’s a big snake couple of puppets in the plane over here, Jock.
Jock: Oh, that’s just my pet snake, Reggie they’re just my puppets, Mrs. Reggie & Dr. Reggie.
Indiana Paat: I hate snakes puppets, Jock. I hate ‘em.
Jock: C’mon, show a little backbone, will ya?

puppet_mom

Hey Kids! It’s Mrs. Reggie! An evil puppet mom!
Sleep tight! It’s only your soul she’s after!

Oh no! It's Dr. Reggie! Here's here to help Mrs. Reggie remove your soul! Good old Dr. Reggie!

Oh no!. It’s Dr. Reggie!
He’s here to help Mrs. Reggie remove your soul!
Good old Dr. Reggie!

Puppets. Scary, stinkin’ puppets. I hate puppets, but I got both for just 4 bits, so I guess maybe I can use them for evil and cheer myself up just a tad.

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What Did Paat Buy Today? #19

Music Inspired by STAR WARS and other Galactic Funk By Meco! And for just 50 cents!

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Just look at that album cover! Just look at it!
This should have been the theme for Return of the Jedi instead of all them damn bears.
Christ! I hate George Lucas!

I haven’t had a chance to listen to it yet, but I know it just has to be the most funky, awesome thing ever! Just like this French disco/jazz version of it.

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Party Rocken

Should I be concerned when I come home to find this painting by Annelise? She’s 6 you know?!

party_rocken

6 year olds should not have “Party Rocken” in their wee, sweet little heads, should they?

I’m not going to survive her teens.

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Bushel of Dogs

Dog mart. Harris & Ewing, photographer. 1937.

Dog mart. Harris & Ewing, photographer. 1937.

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Joe Murphy’s Filet Harmonicats

Strange things are afoot at the fish market. Strange things indeed.

Joe Murphy's Filet Harmonicats entertain at Fulton Fish Market as Danny Brooks weighs a fish.  World Telegram & Sun photo by Dick De Marsico.

Joe Murphy’s Filet Harmonicats entertain at Fulton Fish Market as Danny Brooks weighs a fish.
World Telegram & Sun photo by Dick De Marsico.

Louis De Marco and Michael Tolento doing the twist with a fish as Joe Murphy's Filet Harmonicats entertain at Fulton Fish Market. World Telegram & Sun photo by Dick De Marsico.

Louis De Marco and Michael Tolento doing the twist with a fish as Joe Murphy’s Filet Harmonicats entertain at Fulton Fish Market. World Telegram & Sun photo by Dick De Marsico.

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Roving Bands of Oompa Loompas

From the Norfolk Constabulary:

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That's them! Those guys behind the weird guy in the hat!

That’s them! Those guys behind the weird guy in the hat!

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Merry Christmas!

Merry Christmas from PaatK.com! Please help us choose this year’s card:

The commercial model. McGreetings to You and Yours!

The commercial model. McGreetings to You and Yours!

Creepy drunk Santa. Haunting yet still in the holiday spirit!

Creepy drunk Santa. Haunting yet still in the holiday spirit!

Elves digging in a turd-mine. Not a big fan of this one.

Elves digging in a turd-mine. Not a big fan of this one.

A salute to my time in DC.

A salute to my time in DC.

elvis

The Elvis. It’s not the holidays without the King.

Have a great and happy holiday season!

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Santa Claus (Versus the Devil)

Merry Christmas from the staff here at PaatK.com! Enjoy the Holiday classic Santa Claus (Versus the Devil) and if you can explain anything, anything at all in this movie please clue us in. We’re all a bit frightened and confused.

And good luck ever sleeping again! Ho! Ho!! Ho!!!

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Liam Gives Father Christmas the Stink Eye

Liam does not like strangers. Liam does not like fake Father Christmas.

liam_ftxmas1

What do I want for Christmas?
How about I just give you the stink eye and we’ll call it square? Okay?

Liam gives Father Christmas the stink eye at Rock Ledge Ranch.

Liam gives Father Christmas the stink eye at Rock Ledge Ranch.

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Hitler’s Helpmates

A big, giant bag of WTF with this one from the LOC collection.

Hitler’s helpmates. Adolf has only the most complimentary things to say about Mrs. Miranda Glucose. She has simply captivated him with her Axis-crable behavior. When the possibility of sugar rationing was first mentioned, this far-sighted lady bought up enough sugar to feed twenty-five American families for the next six years. And now that the rationing order has been put into effect, she is deliberately breaking the law by not telling the government about the secret stores. Happy diabetes, Miranda.

Ann Rosener, Office of War Information. April 1942.

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Traveling Crime Museum

Roving crime museums once traveled this great land of ours. What a strange and wonderous time this must have been. Thank God for TV.

A traveling side-show. “Crime Museum,” consisting of a dilapidated effigies of famous criminals run by an old, shell shocked World War veteran. Near Silver Lake, North Carolina.

Effigies of Washington, Joe Louis and some criminal in a traveling sideshow “crime museum”. Washington and Joe Louis are examples of “what you may become if you go straight”. 

Inside the traveling sideshow “crime museum”. The owner, an old war veteran, is pointing out the exhibits. 

Part of the exhibit of the traveling sideshow “crime museum”.

Part of the exhibit of the traveling show “crime museum”.

An effigy of Sitting Bull, part of the exhibit of the traveling sideshow “crime museum”.

Car advertising “crime museum” traveling sideshow.

Sign at traveling sideshow “crime museum.”

Crowds at the traveling sideshow “crime museum”.

At the traveling sideshow “crime museum” with the owner, an old war veteran, and some of his “specimens”.

Pretty sweet stuff! Pay to see the freaks and you get free nightmares for the kids!

All photos by Jack Delano from the Office of War Information. March 1941.

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Waffle Wagons

Photo shows a wagon offering “Hot Waffles 6 for 5c” attracting a small crowd of men and boys at the south front of the Treasury building. Uriah Hunt Painter April 22, 1889.

Look at the above picture. Just look at it! We once had Waffle Wagons in this country! Waffle Wagons! What the hell went wrong with us? This really depresses me. Screw the Ice Cream Man! I want the Waffle Man! Yo! Waffle Man! Give me 6 for a nickel! Okay. Okay. Make it 12 for a dime!

Potomac Electric Power Co. electric appliances. Waffle iron. Theodor Horydczak

Now if you are lucky enough to receive a waffle iron for Christmas, like the beauty above, remember to take good care of it. Really good care of it.

Electric Institute of Washington. Woman cleaning waffle iron. Theodor Horydczak

And maybe, just maybe, you can own more than one.

Electric Institute of Washington. Electric waffle makers.

Your welcome.

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This Land Was Made For You and Me

A series of incredible pictures from Dorothea Lange and her work for the U.S. Farm Security Administration/Office of War Information.

Lighthearted kids in Merrill FSA (Farm Security Administration) camp, Klamath County, Oregon. October 1939.

Farm family in the cut-over land. Priest River Valley, Bonner County, Idaho. The Halley family, FSA (Farm Security Administration) borrowers. October 1939.

Unemployed lumber worker goes with his wife to the bean harvest. Note social security number tattooed on his arm. Oregon, August 1939.

Resettled farm child from Taos Junction to Bosque Farms project. New Mexico, December 1935.

Motherless migrant children. They work in the cotton. June 1935.

Childern at the El Monte subsistence homesteads, California. February 1936.

Migrant agricultural worker’s family. Seven children without food. Mother aged thirty-two. Father is a native Californian. Nipomo, California. February or March 1936.

Powerful, beautiful, inspiring…

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My Favorite Store

My favorite store that I’ve never been to. Always wanted to check it out, but to be honest about it, I kind of scared of what I’d encounter.

I’m sure if you have dragon and/or vacuum needs this would be the place to go.

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Sh*tty Pic of Pikes Peak

New Shitty Pic of Pikes Peak (check out the rest here):

Dusk shot from Academy and Austin Bluffs.

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Cakes for Sky Riders

Air travelers leaving Washington Airport during National Air Travel Week, Oct. 2. 9 are being given a special treat. Cakes baked from their favorite recipes are being put aboard each plane by chefs of the leading hotels in the Capitol. Marjorie McKinnon, Eastern Airline hostess, is pictured receiving the delicacies from (left to right) Theophile Homberger, Hotel Hamilton; Eddie Weber, Shoreham; Joseph Cattaneo, Washington; Fritz Meissner, Hay-Adams; Abraham Grob, Wardman Park; Joseph Tucci, Raleigh; Jacques Haerringer, Shoreham; Otto Merz, Willard, 10/4/38

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Baked Eggs With Cheese

“Share The Meat” recipes. Baked eggs with cheese. Rich in iron and vitamin B, eggs can be cooked a hundred delicious ways. Baked eggs with cheese is a particularly good egg dish, simple and quick to prepare.

Ingredients, in addition to eggs, are grated cheese, bread crumbs, milk, butter, salt and pepper.

Break the desired number of eggs into a hot, well-greased shallow baking dish.
Dot with butter or other fat, sprinkle with salt and pepper.
Pour just enough milk over eggs to cover them.
Sprinkle with a mixture of grated cheese and dry bread crumbs.
Bake in a very moderate oven until the eggs are set and the crumbs are brown.

Eggs with cheese may be served in the same dish in which they have been baked.
A wonderful, vitamin-rich substitute, this dish is an all-American favorite for luncheon or supper.

Yum!

1942 poster asking Americans to conserve meat during the war.

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