Some of the finest examples police reporting this old town has ever come across.
To the criminals, thank you for keeping it weird!
To CSPD, thank you for interjecting some awesome prose into your service to the community.
This rock crime wave is getting out of hand.
Sometimes, in anger, I too offer an obscene hand gesture to the world.
This is some damn exciting writing! Damn exciting!
Never mentions if the large rock was loaded.
4 dudes in the bathroom huh? Just like chicks at the bar.
Like how they are calling them "less lethal" rounds now days. Kind of sweet.
Cockamamie story. The rogues!
It's always a good idea to make your getaway in a limo. Show class and sophistication.
Who won the arm wrestling match?!
Sedate her already! Oh, and you got the month wrong.
The friendly police and Bitey the Dog.
Once again Lt. Buckley you have nailed it with your AWESOMENESS! Dude! You sure write pretty!
More details! Though the witness did not mention the weather, birds chirping or that in the distance a dog barked.
Yes! Now this detailed!
Must have been one awful hat. Just saying.
Title - Suspicious Circumstances. A better title would be - Dude Spankin' it.
I hear a machette is a good way to aquire some U.S. currency.
...or perhaps a troglodyte ate 'em.
Crack Head & Worm. Sounds like the makings of a wonderful adventure.
There are awesome blotter write-ups and then there are AWESOME blotter write-ups. This falls in the later category. Thank you Lt. Buckley!
Wha?! Huh? Long guns? What the?
Um. Should we panic yet? Or get Chris Hansen?
It's Ernest T. Bass! Wiki it! It is!
Sounds like the making of a good folk song. Or every folk song.
Still unruly = punched a cop in the stomach causing pain. Yup.
Could be the driver is a magician. Or a wizard!
“He reportedly had the disheveled look of one without a home…” What a way to call a guy a bum without calling a guy a bum! Huzzah!.
Where did the block go? The mystery continues…
If he was wearing socks was he truly naked? Or just mostly naked?
Lt. Anderson uses “booze” not once but twice. Very Noir fiction of him. Nice touch sir!
This is one story that begs for more detail. Way, way more detail.
I believe if you go so far as hiding in a “maggot infested trashcan” you have done your time and should be free to go.
“Then a twist;” great transition!
“Again, it was because of this superb cooperation between the police department and its citizenry that crimes of this magnitude are solved.” Clap. Clap. Clap.
Would make a great opening paragraph in a mystery novel (you’d flash back from this point).
Just one hell of a story.
Not the best post, but what the hell was in the package? A robot? His lunch? These details are important in writing.
Wow Lt. Buckley! Just Wow! This sentence: “Angered that he was awakened for such a trivial purpose, the resident closed the door without fulfilling his request, which now enraged Santier.” Could not be more awesome!
They also took his beverages? Nothing but a bunch of savages in this town!
His "wrong side of the bed" t-shirt from the last post has a lot more relevance now.
Now that’s a proper description!
These perps seem quite quarrelsome. Quarrelsome to the point of being violent. Oh. And incompetent.
Way to be tenacious Officer Strevett!
“…Robbery with scissors.” I guess you make do with what you have.
“…and had a good time partying together. On the way home, it turned sour…” “…the male grabbed the steering wheel causing the demise of the vehicle…” A big thanks to Lt. Buckley.
“…a mixed race female wearing a multi-colored jacket and unknown pants…” “…and recognized the suspect as a girlfriend of a known troublemaker at the store.” Lt. Wilson again. Sir, you are an artist!
“…the suspect fancies himself as the bar security guard and has been told several times to stop his behavior.” Lt. Wilson, we are in your debt.
"Not only did the driver get back into the vehicle, he sped away from the officer at a high rate of speed..." & then going far beyond the gold standard of report writing with the gem of the week: "The vehicle went to car jail" Thank you Officer M. Reynold! Thank you.